Review: Endgame (2019)

As you may have heard in my May Wrap-Up, I watched Endgame in May! And I'm here today for my review. Which, by the way, is a slight misnomer. This is not even going to try to be an organized review like I do for books. It's, in essence, an expanded version of the usual scattered thoughts/excited screaming that I do for movies in my Wrap-Ups. The one (fairly big) difference is that I actually wrote out these thoughts over the five days it took us to watch it. So you can see my optimism at the beginning, and my unadulterated sorrow through various parts in the middle and the end, etc. Each section is dated on the day I wrote it, so you can watch the progression! (I hope this works. I didn't really see any other way to write the review.) (Also, there are a couple of places where I edited my thoughts a tiny bit. Because, grammar. And, clarity. And boring things like that. XD)

WARNING: I am not even going to TRY to hide spoilers. This will be a spoiler-fest of epic proportions. If you haven't see Endgame, flee while you still can, I beg of you. 
Alright. You've been warned. Also, while we're doing warnings, expect many gifs. 

5/13/21

We watched the first third last night, and I'm taking a moment (when I should be working on my capstone Literature paper, oops) to write down my thoughts so far, because I think it should be fun to see the evolution of my despair opinions.

I CALLED the beginning scene. As soon as Hawkeye showed up with Lila (which was ADORABLE, by the way), I KNEW his family were going to get snapped out of existence. I have rarely been more sorry to be right.

Tony teaching Nebula paper football is everything. Especially when he lets her win. And that recording for Pepper... *cries* (Wait. At that point, WE don't know Pepper is alive, I don't think? I guess I just assumed she was? Maybe because of having watched Homecoming? Haha oops. I have missed out on angst.) And then when Nebula puts him in the chair to sleep...it's very sweet. Not in a shippy way, just in a friend way. I like it very much. "You'd love her. Very practical. Only a tiny bit sadistic." 

And then when Captain Marvel shows up and saves them! YES! And then they get there, and Cap is the one who helps him off the ship, and Pepper is alive, and...my heart can't take it. (And then of course, he gets in a huge fight with Cap but shhhh don't ruin it.)

Okay, I was not remotely expecting the "yep, we killed Thanos, now it's five years later" thing. Not. At. All. It was brilliant.

This is so shallow of me, but I honestly love watching Nat's hair grow out? XD 

Poor Thor. "I went for the head." And then getting all alcoholic and everything. I can see why he blamed himself, but still. (Poor Legolas, also. He's her favorite character, and while my favorite characters are being awesome, hers has become a reclusive lush. XD)

I LOVE NAT BEING THE HEAD OF HQ! She's so awesome. She cares so much. It's her family, and she's being at the center and awesome, and just YES. Also, Okoye, "Nat. It's an earthquake under the ocean. We handle it by not handling it." XD And the part where then Cap comes in and they share a sandwich and talk about how they're not moving on...*whispers* I kind of ship it, guys. I kind of do. 

I'm so glad Scott got pulled back from the quantum realm! Even if it kind of seems like he's on crack with his ideas about time travel. Also, the attempted time travel scene, I am dying.

GUYS TONY AND PEPPER HAD A KID AND I CAN'T HANDLE THE FREAKING ADORABLENESS. I CANNOT HANDLE IT AT ALL. IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO MORGAN I'M GOING TO MURDER SOMEONE. (Seriously, Tony is such an amazing dad. I just...love him as a dad. I mean, I love him, but I especially love him as a dad. "Go to sleep or I'll sell all your toys")

But then Tony comes back to help them not turn Scott into a baby multiple times, and he makes up with Cap, and...I am very happy rn. Also scared. But mostly happy.

I don't know what I think of Smart Hulk. That's kinda weird. But hey, at least they can't ship him with Nat anymore! 

(The thing is, I wanted resolution about why the Hulk doesn't want to come out, and resolution about whether Bruce can come back from being the Hulk, and I didn't get ANY of that! Grr.)

(Also, what Smart Hulk says about time travel kind of makes sense? In a weird way? It's more of a sense of time as internal to people, and external events as being more fixed. Because if you think about it, you "hold" your past within you, and if changing something in the past changed YOUR past, either you'd kind of be torn apart, or you'd totally forget that your past was ever different. So.)

Nat going to get Hawkeye. <3 ("<3" in a FRIENDship sort of way, sheesh guys, he's married. C'mon.)

5/14/21

Watched the second third last night! I also got my first COVID vaccine yesterday, which made for an interesting night afterwards.

The part where they're talking about the stones and Nat is taking copious and detailed notes even of the ridiculous stuff...I love. (Especially the time lapse where she's sitting down, and then lying on the table, etc.) 

This is basically the time-travel third, I guess, and I'm kind of really a fan of the time-travel? Getting to see some of the stuff from previous movies was really fun. (I may or may not have squealed when they rehashed the shot that circles the circle of Avengers in the first Avengers movie). 

Except now the time travel is confusing, because the Ancient One just broke my brain even worse. Oops. 

But oh my word, the part where Scott is like, "so wait, I'm going to give you a heart attack?" and Tony's like "...mild cardiac arrhythmia". XD

And also, getting to see the parts right after Avengers 1 stops (i.e. Loki imitating Cap. Again. XD) was fantastic. As Legolas said, "I wouldn't mind a movie about this parallel universe." 

TONY MEETING HIS DAD! Agh. That was super sweet. And Good. And Right. And Healing. (Except, the part where he tries to give him a hug is very cringy.)

Captain America fighting himself. Just...that was hilarious. Also, him seeing Peggy...<3

Also, Thor getting a pep-talk from his mom, and Rocket sneaking around with the Aether-extractor, and EVERYTHING. 

Am not here for the Nebula drama. Am so not. Please stop. Please just stop and leave future-Nebula alone, past-Nebula and past-Thanos. Can you just not mess this up? (That's probably too much to ask from a Marvel movie, huh?)

Okay. Now to the horrible part.
As soon as I knew where Clint and Natasha were going, I knew this was going to happen.
In fact, I even had spoilers and knew that she was going to die at some point during the movie.
That didn't make it any easier.

THE LITTLE SMILE HELP *crying again*

I cried harder than I have since I-can't-even-remember-when. Legolas looked over and thought I was smiling. No, it was a rictus grin to try to avoid noisily sobbing and disturbing her. We finished the third of the movie and came downstairs, and I kept crying. (I think I seriously frightened my parents.) Like, all-out, heavy-sobs, messy-face, raccoon-eyes crying. It was bad. (Guys. This. Never. Happens. How did Marvel make me FEEL so much?)
And what made it worse was that the whole time I was hoping that Clint would make it him. I just don't love Clint as much as I love (loved? excuse me while I try not to start crying again) Natasha. 

Ahhhh. I don't...can't...
Okay, quotes, instead of trying to find something to say.
"Whatever it takes." "I'm starting to think we mean different people here, Natasha." "I'm trying to save your life, you idiot." "You are a pain in my ass, you know that?" "'I don't judge people on their worst moments.' 'Maybe you should.' 'You didn't.'" "Just let me go." "Clint, where's Nat?" "It should have been me." 

Annnnnnd I need to move on before I start crying again. 

In the very edge of my brain that wasn't deep in grief, I took time to register how perfect the scene with Nat's now-heartless (metaphorically) team is standing on the dock and mourning. (Perfect from a One-Woman Formula standpoint...see Megan's post HERE). If I wasn't already crying, Steve's face alone would have made me cry. Her sacrifice is giving them impetus to move forward, and now I need to stop talking about this, too.

Moving on.

The fact that the new gauntlet is an Iron Man gauntlet makes me inordinately pleased.

And that's all, since we stopped right after Smart Hulk snaps. 

I went to bed with a sore arm from my vaccine, and a sore heart from the movie, which was not the best combo for a peaceful night.

5/15/21

Last night, Legolas was like "Hey, we should watch the first 2/3 again, but with Dad." I reluctantly agreed, mainly because I love the first third, so we watched that last night.

A few things popped out at me more this time around...

First of all, Nat cares SO MUCH about getting the rest of the Avengers back. I mean, I kind of knew that? But this time around, I wasn't writing down quotes, so I had more time to watch the facial expressions...and hers are very telling. <3 

Steve, as Legolas says, is being weird. In the first two-thirds of the movie, he violates a whole bunch of his principles? Like, he condones a same-sex relationship (*growling*), he steals Pym Particles, he uses Loki's staff to mind control himself, etc., etc., etc. It's kind of weird. (At the same time...he is being his awesome Steve-y self, just...slightly off.)

Also: Nat is wearing an arrow pendant during the scenes at the Starks' house. <3 <3 <3 
(I'm not even going to apologize for the number of Nat gifs in this post. I feel like I deserve it for the amount I cried about this movie. XD)

The part where Tony comes downstairs from putting Morgan to bed and Pepper is reading a book about composting...that entire scene is the dynamic between my parents. Always.

5/17/21

Just watched the second third last night, again. I cried, again. In fact, I started crying even earlier this time. XD

Because: Nat hugging Rhodey and telling him to stay safe! Him telling them to watch each other's six! (Can you image how bad Clint feels about that in retrospect??) 

And arggghhhh that moment when Nat and Clint touch foreheads. *crying* (I FRIENDship them so hard, guys. I really do.)

Right before we started watching Endgame with Dad, I asked him who his favorite Avenger was, and he said it was Natasha, and I said something like "Oh cool, yeah, she's even with Tony as my favorite, too." And we geeked out for a moment. Apparently I COMPLETELY fooled him--he thought I came downstairs crying after watching the second third the first time (okay, all these numbers are getting ridiculous) because Tony died. Haha. So yeah, since it was a total surprise to him, he ended up crying, too. Mission accomplished.

I do have a question, though: if, as according the sorcerer supreme, removing an infinity stone from a time makes Time go crazy, why didn't Time go crazy when Thanos destroyed the stones?? Help me out here. Am I just overthinking it?

5/18/21

Finished it last night. Am 100% still processing. XD

M'kay, the moment when Hawkeye's phone starts buzzing? And he answers it and can't talk because he's teared up? <3 <3 <3

BUT THEN THE...AND IT'S ALL...AND THEN BRUCE..AND...AND...TONYSTEVETHOR...AGH. (Um. I promise that was coherent in my head. Lemme try again--at least about the ending bit.)

Tony and Steve and Thor getting together to take on Thanos? YES. And I cannot deny that I was kind of excited that Steve was able to wield Mjolnir, buuuuut...I don't honestly think that there was a whole lot of growth between Age of Ultron and here that would make him That Much More Worthy? Come at me, let's discuss. (Legolas was squealing her head off during that part, obvs. XD)

AND THEN EVERYONE IS KNOCKED OUT AND CAP IS THE ONLY ONE STANDING AND THEN ASADFKSDJDLKS "ON YOUR LEFT" AND AKS:JSLKDJDFSFJ:SKDLFJLKSDJ:FL AMAZINGNESS.
T'Challa!
Peter Parker!
The Guardians!
Sam!
Wanda!
EVERYONE!
AND PEPPER! SHE WORE IT SHE DID!
(Can you tell that *I* was squealing my head off during this part?)

And finally: "Avengers...assemble." *loses mind with excitement*

And the battle! Is epic! And Tony and Pepper fighting back to back! And Pepper being awesome! And them tossing the gauntlet around like a football! And Pepper being like "I got you, kid." (Can you tell I was happy that Pepper showed up?)

TONY HUGGING SPIDERMAN. "Oh, that's nice." (This confirms my secret theory that Tony is an INTJ/ENTJ and Peter is an INFP.)

The woman Avengers all assembling to get the gauntlet through!!! (Except. Not Natasha. And I might cry.)

Old-Gamora beating Peter up. "Don't touch me!" XD I love. Gamora is me.

And then! Tony is sneaky! And he snaps and arrgghhhhhhhhhhhhh. Awesome. Except then he dies. (This has not fully sunken in yet, clearly.) Um. I had spoilers. But I was totally in denial. And ahhh. Pepper. And...yeah.
I didn't actually cry nearly as hard as I did about Natasha? Which was weird? Idk, emotions are fickle and changeable things. I did cry, though. Which was something, still.

The funeral, with the recording, and the flowers with the Proof that Tony Stark Has A Heart...that's where I really started crying.
(Also. Pepper in those scenes, with Morgan, totally reminds me of Jackie Kennedy? Am I off-base about that?)

Hawkeye being reunited with his family!! <3 <3 <3

Also, the moment where he's standing by the lake with Wanda, and remembering Nat, and <3 <3 <3. It's such a great resolution/continuation of Age of Ultron, especially when Wanda says "They both are"...after having hated Tony for so many years (before AoU). The Hawkeye-Maximoff parent-child relationship is the best. 

"The Asgardians of the Galaxy" XD XD XD

Two huge questions about the resolution: Did Old-Gamora just get snapped out of existence with everyone else? and WHAT ON EARTH HAPPENED TO VISION THAT MAKES WANDAVISION POSSIBLE? (Follow-up question: Is Hawkeye in WandaVision? Because I could see that. And I like it.)

Also. Okay. I can see why the filmmakers wanted Steve to have a happy ending. And I would be semi-okay with him and Peggy being together like that at the end. Except, BASED ON THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL HE SHOULDN'T HAVE SHOWED UP BACK IN THE PRESENT. Because--changing the past doesn't change the future. C'mon, guys. Seriously?

The. Credits. With. All. The. Scenes. And signatures. YESSSSS.

Except, also, I was SHOCKED that there was no after-credits scene. Shocked. I guess it kind of makes sense, though?

(Back real quick: just talking to MovieCritic, and HARLEY WAS AT THE FUNERAL? I DIDN'T EVEN SEE...*crying*)

Okay. Deep breath. So. Am I supposed to do a rating? I guess this is a review... I'll give it 4.5 stars! (.5 off because of Steve-related nonsense of various types. :))

So. Have you seen Endgame? (You'd better have, if you've gotten this far.) What did you think? Which death hit you hardest? Which part was your favorite?